Paradox Of Our Lives

There was a monk who lived the most austere life. Monk Theodosius fasted for days together and drank nothing but water. He ate indifferently and whenever he laid his hands on a scrap of black bread he would tell the brother who shared his cell thus: “Efraim, the devil has set this piece of bread to tempt me. What shall I do?”
Ephraim a scarecrow if there were one, would look at it and sigh,-he was starving but more was his curiosity to plumb the secret of the monk’s holiness that defied creature comforts. “If only I could tell you” he would inwardly groan, “ that piece of bread would have slid down my gullet as honey; and warmed my stomach that is cold with hunger.” He dared not show how he lusted after it. “That would be impious!” Efraim always snapped out of his temptation by reciting the prayer the old Patriarch of Kazan had taught him. The monk managed without eating bread and showed no apparent ill effects. But it was hell for Brother Efraim. He would go to his corner and stretch himself on straw and say a prayer : “Oh Jesu make me overcome this lust for bread or let me die.”
One night after an excruciationg spell he prayed thus. Suddenly he was struck by a fit and he fainted. One week he was laid out flat while the monk watched over him and interceded.
One morning Efraim got up and drew water from a well and he drank. The water had turned wine! It was a miracle that spread like wildfire among the serfs and nobility. Efraim was declared a miracle worker. He was on demand by all the great houses and he turned water into wine on demand. He founded a church and built up a large following.
Meanwhile Monk Theodosius was in his cell drinking water and the thought struck him. “I wish I could eat a piece of bread.” As soon as he said these words two persons came to his door and brought a piece of bread. One said it was a gift of the Most Holy Efraim.
“ Why me?”
The messenger replied, “ The Holy One cannot eat bread. He drinks nothing but wine. ”
The old Monk ate the piece of bread and said, “ Damn! Damn!” Never more he prayed and he cursed all the saints in heaven and stamped on the Holy Book. He shook his fists at heaven and said, “ I drank nothing but water but did you make it a pleasure for me? I lived so saintly while you blessed Efraim who could not look at a piece of bread without sinning ?”
In the very thing we lay our strength could work for our fall. How it shall come about is not yet written. It is left for each to work out his/her escape.
benny